Written in Arabic by:

Samah Zaidan Ajjawi

6th year student, Glory batch , 2017-2023

 Translated to English by: Dr. Mohammad A. Awwad

“There is a hope, Isn’t that right Dr. ? “ This what the surgeon asked me during the operation.

Hope, wasn’t just a word, It was a life.

The operating rooms floor in Princess Basma Teaching Hospital has a special awe (My favorite place). You can see in the faces of the patients’ companions in the waiting area many conflicting reactions; anticipation, encouragement, fear, smiles hiding bad feelings, hope and many many reactions. When you walk in the corridors of the OR floor monitors are heard, smell of disinfectants and cautery is there, commands of doctors and nurses ring inside the ears, and in higher pitch is the voice of my heart pounding as if my hear feels with me the special awe of this stance and place while I was preparing myself to scrub for a beautiful medical battle against a subdural hematoma.

I don’t forget the enthusiasm of the neurosurgeon as if he is confident of defeating his enemy, the smile of hope shines in his eyes. Despite of the profuse sweating in his forehead that the circulating nurse wipes, the surgeon was going forward against time and the patient family’s anxiety. He insisted before the operation to assist him as if I am a surgeon assistant. He taught me how to scrub my hands and put the operation gown and sterile gloves in the correct way.

I thought of myself as a superwoman in the movies that will save mankind J , I woke up from my day dreams when the surgeon called me to stand in my place beside the patient’s body. I thought of myself then as a barrier of the smooth movement of surgeons and nurses. Taking a place and consuming Oxygen that maybe I don’t deserve, looking for a phot shot just for a pride that I am doing nothing.

I was a free girl till I was capitated by the view of the human brain. I was in love at a first sight. Wow It’s unfair to compare all the brain models in the labs and the pictures and drawings in the book and the internet sites and application with this beautiful creation. I was looking at it with concentration, trying to know it by hear as a poem. I looked at the eyes of the neurosurgeon, it was an ordinary scene for him after hundreds of times seeing it, but for me it was a historical moment.

I don’t know how does the time of the operation pass. The surgeon was happy with the result and he went in hurry to the waiting room to give the good news to the family.

I remembered then the Medical Oath “ I swear to God to watch his highness always in my profession, any to be one of his Mercy means on Earth”

O God, let’s benefit ourselves and others with the knowledge that you gave us and give us more knowledge.